one step forward...

Yeah, new perspective, blahblahblah. Sounded good, didn't it? If only I could be more consistent. I do actually feel that optimistic sometimes, but it's rare. Then reality comes crashing down when I actually try to change my current situation, like my job, and nothing comes of it. Or I meet with my realtor who is also a friend, and she advises that I wait. Stuck in the house with a mortgage I can barely afford, stuck in a job that doesn't inspire me to grow or learn. Back to square one. Now what?

Of course I'm grateful to have a job, and a home, but is it so wrong to want more? To want something different, something better? Everyone else seems to have all the answers, those people with their great fulfilling jobs, families, fantastic vacations, and debt-free existence. The list of things I wish were different in my life is just way too long. The list of what I can do about the things on that list - well, it's pretty short.